411 Day 11 of a 40-Day Practice

 411 Day 11 of a 40-Day Practice

This is Day Eleven of Lou-is' 40-Day feasting on his individual heart's desire, which is something he wants to attain and to fast from everything, which is unlike it. This project is to build the Spiritual, mental, physical, emotional and social equivalent or container to enable him to change and keep that change, by practice. TODAY: YESTERDAY’S INNOCENCE

DAY ELEVEN OF A FORTY-DAY PRACTICE

MY MISSION STATEMENT - I am devoted, dedicated, committed to experiencing Your Presence, Father consciously, consistently within me and everywhere present. I want to know, to realize, to live for Your Will for me, empowered by Your loving grace. My mission in now clear, I need, I want to share all I am given with whomever You Will, Father. I look to You as my only Source to provide me with everyone and everything it takes to carry out the Mission You gave me. Thank You.

TODAY: YESTERDAY’S INNOCENCE

What happen to my spiritual innocence? In my early years in our Program I was living a most wonderful spiritual innocence with a positive attitude about most everything. I was grateful being an active member of A.A.; I was enjoying the fruits of sobriety in a loving group. I was living in a dream relationship with my to be long-term wife. My business was going great. Above all I was experiencing a Spiritual way of life that was supplying me with an abundance of everyone and everything I need. I was for sure in that most wonderful Spiritual Flow, and often I experience a real mystical union with our Father.

I was enjoying this way of life so much that I did not want to have any more negative, fearful angry stuff in my life and unconsciously I was denying that I had that going on at any level. At the first sign of that unwanted I push it out of my consciousness in other words I stuffed it. I learned the hard way that anything I am unwilling or unable to deal with will at some point deal with me. I found myself in the act of violence that I never believed I could ever do again, yet here I was doing it.

I went into a deep depression after the violence passed, and I hated what I had done and I was unable to forgive myself and I could not find any more than a little release at a time. That came by doing what I had learned early in our Program, I stepped up my A.A. activity. That was fixing me a little at a time, but it was a longtime before I was able to receive a healing loving grace.

I kept trying to recapture that early spiritual innocence that depressed me more. I got into that "if only" stuff. After I work through the 40-Day Workbooks, which includes the first 164 pages of the Big Book and the Steps of the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, I had a Spiritual Transformation. A new Spiritual Awakening, which gave me an adult spiritual innocence, which is far better than the first innocence and for this, I am grateful.

QUESTIONS

Have you experienced a Spiritual innocence?

If you have lost it how have you recovered?

Random Awakening

When I receive one the gifts that symbolize my created individual Self I need to pass it on. I intuitively realize that I cannot claim it as mine until it is demonstrated.