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Responsibility
of Leadership
By
Bill W., General Service Conference, 1963
Our
season of rejoicing, reflection, action and love in close
intimacy is drawing to its close and it will presently belong
to the past. But the impressions and benefits left upon
us which we trust will be carried to others, shall be, I
think, imperishable.
We
have themed this Conference on the subject of Our Common
Welfare. I think this Conference, more than most, has also
been themed on the subject of gratitude. So on behalf of
all, let us renew our gratitude for all who have served
at this end of the line, running down to latest arrived
boy in the packing room. We are not apt to think habitually
in terms of relative importance of people but I think in
Gods sight, he must rather enjoy our error because
he knows that is the cosmic scheme of things that we are
all equally importance. The only thing that distinguishes
us is this, that we are in various stages of progress as
we march along the pilgrims road to eternity. So when we
talk about our common welfare-that word, common-has for
us a singular and poignant meaning. My assignment in this
enterprise has had a certain uniqueness and one of its qualities
about which I am not beefing, but reciting as a condition,
is a tendency to isolation. I had always been a person desperately
wanting to belong and I know I do belong in your affections
and regard in a very singular way and I thank God for that.
Nevertheless, this post has had and does have its isolation
which in late years has grown because the era of "father
knows best" is past. The time of active participation
is over.
You
have come to the moment of full responsibility. So this
is one of the occasions that, since I can no longer travel
among you because the situation cannot be done justice and
because I should not, as the parent of a now grown and responsible
society encourage your dependence upon me, this great and
inspiring yearly exception in this sense, I feel I can be
of and among you and one of you, just about to the degree
that I mingle freely, say little and keep off this rostrum
where old habit makes me renew the father-knows-best role.
So I thank you for letting me at least once a year join
the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous. It is a prized and
treasured experience on which I shall live the next twelve
months.
You
know this society is full of paradoxes; I might say more
emphatically that it reeks of them. It is a sea of phenomena
running counter to the to the powerful trends that we see
in the world today. We have discarded paternalism, except
as a temporary expedient for infants and adolescents. We
have a whole have taken responsibility instead of turning
it over to selfappointed servants. We have done all
sorts of things in our common welfare which the world today
deems so necessary for its welfare. Perhaps, anyway, we
have backed away. There is another paradox to which I wish
to call special attention. I think it was Lord Acton who
once remarked that power always corrupts; absolute power
corrupts absolutely. So in the interest of our welfare,
we have tried so far as we can to give up temptations to
power and fame, to security at the expense of others and
strangely enough, as this is the paradox, we have been able
to bring defective people, who, in His providence, have
been able to bring into being a society seemingly not only
sound in principle but of great beauty and great perfection
in potential. This creation and perfection has been the
work of fallible people as contrasted with other societies
where the morality of governments and the behavior of governments
is far inferior to that of the average person. The society
itself is beauty and perfection, and it stays that way despite
the fact that we each take our turn in being destructive,
in being juvenile and generally acting like hell. Is this
not a great gift of Providence? Yesterday I had occasion
to talk about the group conscience and it is out of the
group conscience and through it, imperfect filter that it
is, because composed of fallible people, that all of this
has emerged. Therefore the group conscience in the light
of our experience is by general acclaim our basic authority.
It is the first part of Tradition Two, but much overlooked
is the part of Tradition Two is that which refers to the
"trusted servant."
Yesterday
I gave a few intimations of what a trusted servant sometimes
tried to be; just for a few minutes I would like to enlarge
on that topic.
The
language of the heart is never bedeviled with semantics,
but the word "servant" sometimes suggests servility,
obedience to unreason, crawling before adversity. This isnt
the meaning for us. Another badly twisted word is "leadership"
and I think Ive heard A.A.s say it is a dirty
wordand that slant is perfectly natural, because as
we survey the world around us and its leadership, we see
in this society of ours that if these forces ever really
got in the saddle we would have trouble. So the trusted
leader in A.A. has to be quite something else. He is not
the superior person, he is a fallible person (and I belong
in the rear rank) but he is a person endowed with certain
talents, given a certain opportunity and he is supposed
to lead. What do we mean by leadership and what does this
require of us who have this trustedservant tag on
us? How do we relate ourselves to this "conscience,"
the ultimate kind?
Well,
I think I pointed out yesterday that everybody in a certain
sense is a leader in the society, everybody carries the
language of the heart to the guy or gal still suffering.
This is the supreme leadership, this is the greatest trusted
area, but there are those of us who find ourselves cast
into assignments of service leadership. This is nothing
but a specialty in which we are supposed to become expert
and dedicated to the task of making the primary leadership
possible. If life is to be carried to the newcomer, he has
to be brought within reach. This is our business here, it
is the business of every Intergroup, every group committee.
And we who man these special enterprises are commonly called
trusted servants, and this implies leadership of the highest
order, minus the usual implications.
What
are some of the requisites? I think the greatest of all
is love and understanding and forgiveness of the sins of
all kinds and conditions of A.A. members with whom we deal.
There must be that communication of the heart, otherwise
we shall have no right or authorization to serve in this
capacity. This is number one. Thats the kind of thing
that flows and must be possessed by the sponsor as he talks
to the man on the bed, and we should acquire this in great
measure. It is said that leaders are born and not made,
but in A.A., paradoxically, we do make them. They learn
how. Some of us had a like experience which has proved of
great value. I think this has been my case and it has been
with many. It doesnt make us more important, just
makes us more useful in some particular way.
Another
attribute of leadership; Once you get in one of these spots
of leadership, even on a group committee, as these forces
grow and become exaggerated and as we get more responsibility,
pressures and temptations grow as well as the satisfactions.
The temptation to distinction and to buy approval at any
price; the temptation to present one persona to the people
you are leading when privately you have quite another one-these
become exaggerated and these have been my temptations and
yours. And little by little, you want people, when any good
will be served, to know you as you really are- the best
and the worst. So leadership inevitably brings out our best
in this society and because of these pressures, it frequently
brings out or worst and this can be valuable, and our best
can be very, very good. So it has been with me. I sometimes
think it has brought out the best and sometimes the worst.
So we must realistically look at this without fear, because
the record shows that fallible people thrust into these
positions of responsibility and pressure, do in the aggregate
come through.
Lets
take a look at another quality of leadership. The minute
you get in a position like this you suddenly find yourself
on the receiving end of inordinate credit and praise, and
even if you know that it is exaggerated, you love it. But
if you devour too much of this, in creeps pride and this
tendency to think "I am someone different." So
a leader has to say, "What is reality?" Is this
the image that people would have me fit, or am image I can
fill, or am image that I know represents who I am? So an
inventory has to be taken, then comes our critics, the constructive
ones and they say to us, I think you are making a mistake,
I think this is wrong, I think you are biased, sore; I dont
want to preach, I love you, but I want to help. We have
to listen to this so carefully as we should listen carefully
to the group conscience when we are sure we know what its
talking about. Then come critics of even more value, critics
who are angry, sick, hostile, and who sometimes will employ
the methods of attack that congregates forgot in 1900. So
now we are hurt; and because these sick ones unknowingly
have tried to elevate themselves by downgrading others,
we who are supposed to know better, repeat the same process
and we proceed to downgrade them in order to make ourselves
feel secure and we indulge in all sorts of indignation,
all of which we label as righteous.
We
have to watch this, particularly in the role of trusted
servants and we must not allow ourselves to believe in unreasonable
downgrading and say, yes, I am unworthy. This wont
do because it is not so. The defects, yes, so we admit the
defects to ourselves and to others and we accept the fact
that we have them. I can promise you that if I had pondered
exclusively on my list of defects and that pondering had
resulted in continual guilt and depression, I should have
long ago been incapable of service. We are not saints; we
claim progress and not perfection. The only thing we can
do perfectly is to admit our mistakes.
Now
when we look at the bright side as trusted servants, let
us not say that it is prideful; let us say that it is realistic
to have a healthy self-esteem. Too often we forget that
the Fourth Step includes capabilities. So without pride
or exaggeration, say "yes, I do have these capabilities.
These are not of my making, they are Gods gifts, but
I do have them and they are used in this work of being a
trusted servant." So then we get in a condition of
balance between light and dark, which I think is humility
for today. Another thing a leader must have is the capability
of making estimates, of helping to frame plans, of taking
advice, of consulting, of making an estimate for the future.
Some say this is heresyit should be one day at a time,
God will provide.
Another
paradox. Emotionally, one day at a time, God will provide
for today. But let us not suppose that he doesnt expect
us to use our capability for making estimates and plans
for the future. So let us try to do this. We shall sometimes
fail but this is better than doing nothing for fear of failing.
This your trusted servant must strive to do. You dont
live emotionally in the future, but your estimate that if
we have a certain set of conditions, what is liable to happen
in the future? This is natural and we can learn and consciously
acquire it and some of us have great gifts for which we
arent responsible-they came out of birth, but let
them be used.
Then
there is this quality of obedience to the group conscience.
When you are sure this conscience is right, and when the
questions concerned are within its experience, you would
do well to obey and overcome these reluctance, overcome
your now acquired habit that servants should consult servants.
That the servants know better. Learn to compromise. In fact,
somebody has said that progress spiritually or in other
ways is composed hopefully of an increasing series of better
and better compromises. So the discrimination of when to
obey or to engage in compromise is important. Now there
are certain times, they dont come often, they are
very rare, some of you may not have encountered them at
all, thrust into the position in which I stand. You can
have guessed there are times when you have to stand alone
and then you take inventory and then you try to make estimates
and you try to curb your anger and your power driving; you
dont succeed entirely but if the responsibility for
this decision is really yours and outside the knowledge
of the group conscience, maybe you are going to disagree
with your best friends, get widespread criticism, hostility
and disapproval. But if it is your responsibility to the
future, you have to face the fact that leadership is not
a question always of espousing popular opinions or causes.
There comes a few times when your responsibility is such
and convinced that your station gives you a wider vision
than others have the advantage of, then, you must stand
alone; in fact, this standing alone is expressed in the
Concepts where there is such a concern for minorities and
their rights and how often they can be right and this also
applies to a minority of one.
At
important turning points in the history of A.A., it has
become my lot to stand in those lonely positions. I am glad
I was given those chances and that no grievous error resulted
- Thank God.
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